That’s pretty good. If he can’t defend the pack against the attack will they all be killed?

I like it, it has potential. It has her goal (escaping the genetic researchers, learning to use her powers). It sounds like the researchers are also going to be the conflict. What happens if she is caught? Why is it dangerous for her to trust the werewolf? What happened that prompted the genetic researchers to try to capture her?

I think the second one is better. Loglines can be two lines. But the general rule is no more than twenty-five words. Usually that means one line. Now, some publishers don’t care if it’s one line or two or even three. The most important thing is to put in the interesting parts so you grab their attention.

What’s the inciting incident though? And is that the only conflict? She doesn’t have time for rich playboys?

Finding his shifter mate was easy. Now to convince her of her werewolf nature while defending his Pack and family against an unexpected attack.

Having world-class no-holds-barred sex with your client was a definite no-no. Manhattan’s newest advertising executive Kylie Brandt was the one who made the rule; would she also be the one to break it with super sexy, rich, gorgeous publishing magnate Damien Ryder?

in the various logline examples (on harlequin) that I have read, they were two lines, and mostly ended with a question. Here’s the other I tried…

Rock climbing was easy according to well known adventurer and publicist Damien Ryder – compared to getting advertising exec Kylie Brandt into his bed. She has no room for rich playboys in her busy life, much less a wanderer like Damien, or does she?

any suggestions for a logline loser?

=)

carrie

You’re welcome. I find it really helps to have the logline first.

Hi, Barb.

It does take practice but I’m convinced you can master it. You can still send me your loglines if you want help with them.