Posted On April 5, 2012 by Print This Post

RU’s April Showers Contest

April showers bring May flowers and another fun contest. In honor of April Fool’s Day, Easter bunnies, marshmallow Peeps, and taxes, your entry must contain all four of the following words:

fool   bunny   peep   taxes

Here are a couple of examples:

As inevitable as death and taxes, my aunt Ronnie Sue’s annual April Fool’s Pre-Easter costume bash brought out the worst elements of the neighborhood—snot-nosed kids whining because someone forgot to hard boil the eggs in the Easter egg hunt, drunken fathers trying to bag terrified bunnies in the vegetable patch and, worst of all, stuck up martini sipping mothers using Peeps as swizzle sticks,  and looking right through me as they held out their sticky glasses for refills.
  

Bunny Weems, proprietress of Tingles All Over, wasn’t a fool for the taking nor would she cheat on her taxes and draw the ire of the Infernal Revenue Service. But the dour, gum-soled IRS agent showed up anyway. An hour later, after a complimentary Deluxe Magic Fingers-Feel-Like-A-Million-Bucks full-body massage, which wasn’t listed on the menu, the IRS man left without a peep, but with an extra hop in his step.

One or more sentences not to exceed eighty words total.

Place your entry in the comments section below.

Entries must be received no later than 11:59 p.m. PST on Friday, April 6th.

Limited to two entries per person.

Judges: Editor Theresa Stevens and the RU staff

***

First place prize:

A $25 Amazon gift card.

Second place prize:

A $10 B&N gift card.

***

Winners announced on Sunday, April 8th.

Contest limited to participants in U.S. and Canada.

Published? Unpublished? It doesn’t matter! Be creative and join in the fun!

 

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Discussion

69 Responses to “RU’s April Showers Contest”

  1. Oh this should be a riot! =)

    Posted by Carrie Spencer | April 3, 2012, 10:00 pm
  2. Talking to herself was a bad habit, but not one Jenny could break.
    “Bunny outfit? – Check.”
    “Marshmallow peep box? – Check.”
    “Let’s DO this!” Jenny opened the door labelled ‘Office of Taxes’. “Happy Easter!,” she sang, and aimed an avalanche of peeps at the toiling workers inside. Startled, they realised their normally grim boss was dressed as the Easter Bunny.
    Then Jenny reached inside the rabbit costume and pulled out her familiar whip. “April Fool! Back to work, everyone.”

    Posted by Alison | April 4, 2012, 7:18 am
  3. Thanks for being brave enough to go first, Alison! I love Jenny and her whip!

    Posted by Becke Martin/Davis | April 4, 2012, 8:45 am
  4. Amanda Sue was no fool–she knew to get her taxes prepared early, so she could then either get a refund(doubtful) or have her taxes deducted automatically from her checking account, and then budget like crazy afterwards. Having a boyfriend who would take her out for a night on the town afterwards would help take some of the sting off losing money to Uncle Sam. She paused in front of the candy aisle–how had she gotten THERE, when she was supposed to be in the canned vegetable section? Oh, look, there was a Chocolate bunny, just begging her to take it home with her. It sure seemed like the stores put out Easter candies earlier and earlier each year. Oh, and right next to the Chocolate bunny was a package of yellow Peeps! Those were so full of sugar, she was sure that she would have to limit herself to just one peep–maybe take the others to work and pass them around–why should she be the only one on a sugar high???

    Posted by Fricka | April 4, 2012, 9:51 am
  5. Due to a hostile takeover, Bunny was out of a job. Not that she was surprised; Lamb had been planning an attack for months. What hurt was being played for a fool by Chick, her former boss. He or his peeps must have known. As she hopped to her car, another plan started to hatch. What did these sons of slime have in common? Illegal chocolate stashes, unpaid Easter bonnet taxes, hidden plastic eggs? The hunt was on.

    Posted by Mary Jo Burke | April 4, 2012, 10:09 am
  6. All Jenny wanted to do was finish her taxes–she was no fool who put off the loathsome task until the last moment. The Chocolate bunny and box of Yellow Peeps she had bought for Easter treats would have to wait until she finished. If she was lucky, she could fob off a Peep or two on her new boyfriend, and he would take her out to celebrate.

    Posted by Fricka | April 4, 2012, 10:19 am
  7. Yay Fricka and Mary Jo – I love these!

    Posted by Becke Martin/Davis | April 4, 2012, 10:26 am
  8. “What kind of fool do you think I am that I wouldn’t find out you slept with Bunny when you were supposedly doing the taxes?” Helen demanded. She pulled out her revolver and pointed it at the cheating scumbag who’d cost her more than any deduction was worth. “No one will hear a peep out of you ever again.”

    Posted by Sara Daniel | April 4, 2012, 2:41 pm
  9. The Mardi Gras masquerade party was in full swing as Marge and Sue entered. This year the two sisters had decided to dress in a manner that would go against type and tax their imaginations.

    Marge—the outgoing, envelope-pushing, adventuresome free spirit—was dressed as Little Bo Peep. Sue—the restrained, quiet, straight-laced conformist—was dressed as a Playboy Bunny. But even with their masks on, would anyone be fooled?

    Posted by Mary Anne Landers | April 4, 2012, 3:05 pm
  10. “Next case!” shouted the judge. The bailiff dragged in a trembling peasant wench, then said, “Molly Derwent, caught poaching a bunny from the King’s forest.”

    Molly hardly dared to peep at the judge. He glared at her harshly. “You’ve been here before, Mistress Derwent.”

    “Your Honor, my family and I were hungry. We had nothing left after taxes.”

    “Don’t try to fool me with your sad stories. I sentence you the maximum punishment. Transportation to the American colonies. Next case!”

    Posted by Mary Anne Landers | April 4, 2012, 3:23 pm
  11. Bunny held the frosty glass of mint iced tea, liberally fortified with bourbon, to her forehead. “My goodness, cooking a meal in this infernal heat taxes me so.”

    Harry stared at the newspaper. He was no fool. Making eye contact with his wife would be a tactical error. Uttering the slightest peep showed weakness. He studied the classified ads and waited for the next barrage.

    “Just thinking about plunging my hands into scalding dishwater makes my poor heart palpitate.”

    Posted by Janel Gradowski | April 4, 2012, 6:46 pm
  12. Betty felt like such a fool. How in the world did she let Jane talk her into applying for a position as a waitress at the Playboy Club? Now here she was, dressed as a bunny, not allowed to make a peep when the clients pinched her bottom! If she weren’t in so much trouble with the IRS over her ex-husband’s taxes, there would be no way in hell she’d ever be seen in public with a white, fluffy tail.

    Posted by C.T. Charles | April 4, 2012, 7:12 pm
  13. Poor Betty! Patrons pinching her bottom line because she didn’t pay attention to the bottom line. She needs to lose that zero and get herself a hero!

    Posted by Jennifer Tanner | April 4, 2012, 7:32 pm
  14. Dressed as a bunny, Daniel kneeled on the carpet, holding a pink sprinkled marshmallow Peep chick in one hand and a diamond solitaire ring in the other.

    “Put me out of my misery and marry this fool, Julia. I promise you a lifetime of love, friendship and lower taxes.”

    Posted by Shelly Bell | April 5, 2012, 8:53 am
  15. “That’s not a bunny, it’s a hare,” said the little girl stepping up to Mr. Whisker’s cage. I was told she was five, but I was no fool. The way my luck was running the little peep could do my taxes for me. Heck, I wouldn’t mind that. But I was not about to give up on her hot dad just because his little girl could defeat me over a Scrabble board.

    Posted by Patchi | April 5, 2012, 9:22 am
  16. The Kung-Fu style shin kick added another bruise to Glenda’s growing collection. The faux fur offered little defense against a toddler equipped with glitter-encrusted dress shoes and a bad attitude. She stuffed a neon pink, marshmallow Peep in the little girl’s chubby fingers and waited for the next assault. Glenda was a fool to take the job. There were two certainties in life: taxes and little children are always terrified of Easter Bunny impersonators.

    Posted by Janel Gradowski | April 5, 2012, 9:41 am
  17. He wore a bunny suit and played the fool, dancing and waving a sign that warned passing drivers that tax day was coming. Several peeps had been sacrificed for the cause, stuck to the sign using only their marshmallow stickiness. A bright yellow smear on the sidewalk suggested that wasn’t always enough, but it hadn’t slowed him down a bit.

    Jill stopped to watch him spin. It wasn’t even a sexy bunny suit.

    Was she becoming a furry?

    Posted by Clothdragon | April 5, 2012, 10:03 am
  18. I stood in front of a full-length mirror adjusting the bunny ears on the top of my head, before turning around to fluff the white ball on my backside. My lacy lingerie covered less than a skimpy swimsuit, but I didn’t look half-bad as I opened the door for the IRS agent and invited him inside.

    I owed five thousand dollars in taxes that year, but my little peep show brought my total down to five dollars.

    Posted by Teresa Nordheim | April 5, 2012, 8:32 pm
  19. Now that’s a smart bunny!

    Posted by Becke Davis (Becke Martin) | April 7, 2012, 9:21 am
  20. Thanks everyone for entering our April contest! We’re in the process of judging the entries. It’s going to be very close!

    Posted by Jennifer Tanner | April 7, 2012, 4:42 pm

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  1. […] today is Easter Sunday, I thought I’d post my recent entry submitted to the Romance University April Showers Contest. Here’s what the contest […]

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