You know how you think you can just tell what kind of relationship a man and woman have just by looking that them? HH says it’s all about how a guy treats his lady.
I’ll admit it. I’m nervous. Being a newly designated contributor for RU has got my blood rushing. After-all, you don’t know me and I haven’t had a chance to get to know any of you yet either. This first post is a first date of sorts between us, isn’t it?
In that vein, let me give you a little insight into why, as a man, I accepted the invitation to join RU and embraced the chance to prove true romance isn’t lost on all men. So settle in, let me pour us a drink and let’s get to know each other.
As I believe all writers are, I am an avid people watcher. I love heading out to the local mall, bistro or park and observing dozens of stories play out in front of me. In most cases there will be a man and a woman I watch (it’s not as creepy as it sounds) and I try to determine the status of their relationship by the way they treat one another. It’s disheartening to watch a couple just going through the motions in one case and inspiringly uplifting to watch another couple who gaze at each other as if no one else is around. It is both of these sets of couples that inspire me to write about romance.
Watching an elderly man as he, even after 40 years of marriage, still opens the car door for his beloved wife motivates me to educate other men; not that they should just do it but why it makes their partner feel special. That is where the reason for doing it lies.
When I watch an inattentive twenty-something guy seated at a restaurant stare at the behinds of other women over his girlfriend’s shoulder as she attempts to tell him of her day, it makes me want to write a romantic story his girlfriend will read that lets her know there are men out there who will treat her with the respect, attention and unflinching devotion she deserves.
(Let me pour us a refill?)
For me, I am affected by the reactions of the women in the above examples. My heart glows as I see the girlish smile on the elderly lady’s face as she says Thank You to her husband. My blood boils as I watch the young lady take a nervous pull of water from her straw and pretend not to notice her boyfriend’s wandering eyes; waiting patiently for him to focus them back to her while, unnecessarily, wondering what it is about her that can’t hold his attention.
It is reactions such as those which inspire me to write Romance.
I am attending a Romance Writer’s Conference in a couple of weeks and it was pointed out I will be one of VERY few men there. I hadn’t thought about it at all until it was mentioned. While I know there are other men like me out there, I find it sad there aren’t more. I think most men find “Romance” sissy-like. They see it as a weakness when it is a strength they can tap into in order to fortify their relationship and make their lover feel secure and safe. As a constant observer of men and women (ok that sounded a little creepy..better pour us some more wine) I love laying witness to that rare man who showers his lady with attention in public and doesn’t care what anyone thinks. Those are the real men in my book of romance.
So, Fellow Romancers, if you’ll promise to call me for a second, third and even a fourth date, I look forward to providing insight into those men’s minds as well as my take on the women’s. I’m eager to read your feedback as well.
Well, it looks as if the bottle is empty so I guess our first date is coming to an end. (Now if you don’t mind, kindly remove your hand from my knee. I’m not that kind of guy.)
How do you think a real man should treat a lady in public?
Join us Friday when Laurie Schnebly Campbell talks about why content, not size, matters in a book blurb.
Bio: Like most of us, I’ve been around the block a time or two (or three) in the relationship world. I like to think of myself as having a pretty thick skin, however, that skin doesn’t surround the heart.
I’ve been in love; I’ve been in lust. I’ve been hurt and got up to do it all again, each time having learned more of myself as well as “wants” and “don’t wants” for my next relationship. Amazingly enough, I never gave up on that one true love wrapped in Romance. You can visit me here, at http://thedanceofromanceonline.com
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