I have never heard anyone say, “I went through my entire novel and changed everything but the opening.”

When I was writing my novel FAST LANE, I got all kinds of advice on how to improve the opening. I needed to “start in the middle of the action.” I needed to get readers to like or to identify or side with the characters. I needed to have a hook.

All three were essential, but seemed mutually exclusive.

One critiquer even told me I had to start in the middle of the action and introduce the characters later and introduce the characters more thoroughly right away because, since he didn’t know anything about them, there was no reason for him to care about the action.

In math, that’s known as a null set. Math confuses me.

Besides, I thought I was starting in the middle of the action. FAST LANE is about a woman who insinuates herself into a playboy’s life with the intention of destroying his image and his business because she believes they’re ruinous to women, so I opened with the heroine, Lara, pitching her plan to a potential backer.

Members of my writer’s group said they needed to know more about Lara and see her transformation from “regular girl” to “woman who’d be able to seduce a billionaire playboy.” So I filled the next thirty or so pages so with background information about her, interwoven with details about her preparation—workouts, waxing, tanning, hair dyeing, lessons on how to lie. Beta readers said the result reeked of datadump.

Do you feel a migraine coming on? I did. Even now, just describing it.

Fortunately, I have a sharp editor. Her name is Mary Jo. She’s my wife, too, but that’s a different story. Like me, she puzzled and puzzed till her puzzler was sore, and came up with a solution. Flying around the first thirty pages of my Word doc, she developed an outline of what should be in FAST LANE’s opening. My brain didn’t feel any better at first, but slowly I came to realize that the circles in the graph were moving closer together, that it was possible for these seemingly incompatible demands to intersect, wiping out the null set and fulfilling the requirements that make up an effective opening.

My original first line was:  Lara Dixon folded her arms and glared out the window. “Because,” she said, “Clay Creighton must go down.”

Middle of the action? Or was I was confusing “the middle of a sentence” with “the middle of the action?”

That opening did convey that Lara Dixon is the main character. That she’s pissed off at this Clay Creighton guy. And, maybe, that she has a plan to bring him down. But from there it was straight downhill for one-seventh of the book. And the most critical one-seventh at that.

What do you do when people say you need to change your opening? Delete Chapter One? Maybe. But maybe there’s a better Chapter One hiding inside the one you already have. What you need to do is find it. Whittle it out the way a woodcarver fashions a fishing lure from a basswood block.

• Start by making a list of what readers absolutely need to know to get into the story.

• Then pick a few choice cuttings from the overgrown tree of your prose that demonstrate those points.

• Then look for the place where your heroine stands on the brink of a new phase of life and shape that into your opening line.

Easy, right? I’ll be the first to admit it’s not. But here’s how the process went for me.

Step 1

List the minimum amount of information necessary to pull readers into your story. Here’s what readers needed to know at the beginning of FAST LANE:

• Lara’s pissed off at Clay.

• Clay’s made billions instructing men on living the high life.

• Clay has a gimmick called The Rotation—three women who are always on his arm, with one member replaced every six months.

• Lara’s ex-husband was a serial cheater and a Fast Lane devotee.

• Lara’s made herself over to be more appealing to Clay.

Step 2

Find details that matter. For example, Lara’s prep—1,800 words in my original first chapter—could be summarized in just 68 words:

Lara thought about the weeks she’d spent in the gym. The coaching sessions on how to lie, with a mysterious woman whose name and accent changed daily. The hours poring through the enormously popular Fast Lane website, reading Creighton’s daily encyclicals on materialism and carnality until she could easily extemporize on the advantages of gadgets she’d never use and the attributes of running backs she’d never cheer for.

Even better, those 68 words pruned two branches with one snip by also introducing the Fast Lane business model—something I’d taken more than a thousand words to explain in the original draft.

I’d also spent more than a thousand words explaining why Lara was so angry with Fast Lane and Clay. Here are the ten that survived:

An instructional guide on how to screw over your wife.

Step 3

Find that threshold moment, where your heroine is about to enter a new world. This is the final opening line to FAST LANE:

The limo jerked hard to the right, sending Lara Dixon sliding across the slick leather seat.

Middle of the action? Within a couple lines, you learn that Lara is way beyond proposing her scheme. She’s in the car, minutes away from putting the plan into action. On the cusp of a life-changing event. Literally at a crossroads.

Like all the pieces I’ve mentioned, this was hidden in my original draft:

Neither of them expected the car to jerk so hard to the right that Lara thought maybe they had hit something.

Which appeared on page 18. Eighteen! That’s where I had buried the most effective opening of the book.

After a few weeks of blood, tears, sweat and toil—and swearing and surliness and migraines—I took the new opening, 703 words as opposed to more than 3,800, back to the very people whose comments had led me to add a bunch of back story to the front in the first place—my writer’s group.

And they loved it. In fact, several of them said they understood the characters, the set-up and the back story more than when the passage was five times as long!

And there was a bonus. If readers could get what was going on from my new svelte opening, there was no need to find places to wedge in the compost I’d removed. I did not have to go through my novel and change everything but the opening.

Odds are that after you’ve finished your first draft someone—if not everyone—will say you need to change Chapter One. Do not despair. Everything you need to craft a killer opening—one that grabs readers, connects them to your heroine and launches them into the story—is almost certainly there. You have to prune back the dead wood to find it.

***

Have you ever reworked your first chapter? Cut it out entirely? Share your agony with us.

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Author Virginia Kantra joins us on Monday, April 9th.

***

FAST LANE is available on Amazon in e-book and print format. Here’s a quick blurb:

Lara Dixon goes undercover to bring down notorious Fast Lane media mogul Clay Creighton and his entourage of beautiful women known as The Rotation. But Lara discovers Clay and Fast Lane are not what they seem. Can Lara put the brakes on her plan and remain on the road to happily-ever-after?

And an excerpt beginning with page one:

The limo jerked hard to the right, sending Lara Dixon sliding across the slick leather seat.

That can’t be good.

The man seated across from her—the man Gina had found to introduce her to Clay Creighton—scrambled upright and banged on the plexiglas partition separating them from the driver, a uniformed woman who had quarter-inch silver hair peeking from beneath a livery cap.

“What the hell?” he demanded as the partition slid open. “Did you hit something?”

The driver met Lara’s questioning gaze in the rearview mirror. “Oops.” The partition slid shut.

That really can’t be good.

Lara flipped down a mirror to fix her hair. Her natural color shimmered through the semisweet chocolate veneer. Hard to get used to after thirty-two years as a blonde.

“Just a bump in the road.” Anton Roche worked his neck like a preening turkey and settled back in as the limo raced past Paradise Cove on the road toMalibu. “As I was saying, the girl thought she was the aurora borealis,Liberty’s torch and the leprechaun’s pot o’ gold rolled into one. But she knew she looked even hotter in my bustier.”

Lara suppressed a sigh. How does Gina put up with this guy? The lingerie designer had prattled about his life with the glitterati from the minute he’d picked her up at her humbleSanta Monica apartment. She wished he’d let her concentrate on this new experience of riding in luxury. After tonight, she might never step into a limo again. Then again, Roche had put his turkey neck on the line to talk up Lara to Clay Creighton.

He has his own axe to grind, but I should at least pretend to be interested.

“Why is it the ‘STP’ bustier?” Lara asked, though after weeks of researching Creighton’s Fast Lane empire, she knew the answer. Never hurts to practice. You’ll be lying all the time if everything goes right tonight.

Roche straightened with pride. “‘Seconds toParadise.’ It’s goddamn brilliant. Builds up the bust—and a man can unhook it one-handed like that.” He snapped his fingers. “You know how much money Creighton’s made from that thing? It’s the biggest seller in the Toy Store. But do I get the credit?” He looked more closely at Lara. “It wouldn’t have been a bad idea for you to wear one tonight.”

Lara had considered buying one from Fast Lane’s notorious online gift shop back when she was married. “I thought STP had something to do with gasoline.”

“Yeah, well…Fast Lane: Racy cars, the high life…and all that.”

Fast women, fast cars, fast living. I know all about Fast Lane and Clay Creighton.

***

Bio: Dave Thome likes football, cooking and women, though not necessarily in that order. His 2012 novel, FAST LANE, is available as an ebook and paperback from Amazon. The companion “making of”book, MAN WRITING A ROMANCE, is available only as an ebook. Dave is also written several screenplays, including four that were optioned by film production companies. A journalist who writes a weekly column on automotive technology, he lives in Shorewood,Wisconsin. www.manwritingaromance.blogspot.com/

April showers bring May flowers. And so much more! The line-up this week begins with our regular columnist, query letter expert C.J. Redwine. Tuesday is extra special. We’re pleased and excited for RU founder Tracey Devlyn whose first book debuts on April 3rd. On Wednesday, we welcome author Ruth Harris to the podium for a discussion on real men versus fictional men. Finishing out the week, author Dave Thome shares his experiences on wrestling with the first chapter.  

Mon, 4/2 – C.J. Redwine critiques another reader submitted query letter. http://cjredwine.blogspot.com/

Tues, 4/3 –  Pop the cork and pass the canapes! RU’s own Tracey Devlyn debuts her book A LADY’S REVENGE. http://traceydevlyn.com/

Wed, 4/4 –  What traits are important to you in a man? Are they the same traits you give your heroes? NYT best-selling author Ruth Harris reveals why you’re better off with a real man as opposed to that irresistable bad boy. http://annerallen.blogspot.com/p/about-ruth-harris.html

Fri, 3/30 –  Men write romance. Author Dave Thome is one of them. Dave talks about the all important first chapter and his method of getting it right. http://manwritingaromance.blogspot.com/

All Romance University lectures are generously provided by our Visiting Professors. RU is a tuition-free zone! 

All our best, 

Jennifer Tanner, Becke Martin-Davis, Kelsey Browning, Adrienne Giordano, Robin Covington, Carrie Spencer, and Tracey Devlyn.

Take a seat at the front of the class as RU presents another great week of free lectures. Jenel Looney and Sheridan Stancliff start the week off with a discussion on streamlining your busy life with the help of virtual assistants. Author Damon Suede talks about the connection between verbs and your characters. On Friday, author Christy Reece presents a lecture on writing a second series.  

Mon, 3/19 – How much time do you spend promoting your book on Twitter? Maintaining your presence on Facebook and other social networks? Do you worry about finding the time to actually write? Virtual assistants Jenel Looney and Sheridan Stancliff have a roster of busy authors as clients. Learn about their services and how you can simplify those must-do non-writing tasks. www.jenellooney.com http://sheridanink.com/

Wed, 3/21 – Can you describe your character in one word? Two? Back by popular demand, author Damon Suede joins us again to address reader’s comments and how to describe your main characters with the use of verbs. www.damonsuede.com

Fri, 3/23 – NYT best-selling author Christy Reece talks about the pros and cons of tackling a new series after you’ve already written a successful one. Christy is also giving away two books from her Last Chance Rescue series to one lucky commenter. http://christyreece.com/

All Romance University lectures are generously provided by our Visiting Professors. RU is a tuition-free zone!

All our best,

Jennifer Tanner, Becke Martin-Davis, Kelsey Browning, Adrienne Giordano, Robin Covington, Carrie Spencer, and Tracey Devlyn.

Feeling a bit groggy after turning the clock ahead an hour? Here at RU, we’re springing ahead and zooming down the informational highway with the top down! Author Athena Grayson explains the QR code and why it’s a powerful marketing tool. Sara Megibow gives us an agent’s perspective on shopping self-published titles, and our editor emeritus, Theresa Stevens is back with her column, Ask An Editor. 

Mon, 3/12 – That funny looking square with the black and white dots isn’t a mini-Rorschach test. It’s a Quick Response Code which gives prospective readers the 411 on your book. Athena Grayson tells us how the QR code works, why your book should have one, and how you can create your own. http://athenagrayson.com/blog/

Wed, 3/14 – Are you a self-published author looking for representation? Is your ultimate goal to land a contract with a traditional publisher? Do agents represent self-pubbed authors? Agent Sara Megibow of The Nelson Literary Agency explains the whys and why nots of this complex issue. 

Fri, 3/16 – Have a burning question for an editor? Theresa Stevens returns with her monthly column, Ask An Editor. http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/

All Romance University lectures are generously provided by our Visiting Professors. RU is a tuition-free zone!

All our best,

Jennifer Tanner, Becke Martin-Davis, Kelsey Browning, Adrienne Giordano, Robin Covington, Carrie Spencer, and Tracey Devlyn.

Can you believe it’s March already? We’re starting off the month with lectures that we hope will benefit your career as a writer. C.J. Redwine shows us how to write an effective query letter. Allie Pleiter discusses the importance of branding and Tracy Sumner gives us tips on editing your masterpiece. Pull up a chair and join us.

Mon, 3/5 – C.J. Redwine’s back in the lecture hall with another critique of the all important query letter. http://cjredwine.blogspot.com

Wed, 3/7 – Are you ready to market yourself as well as your book? Author Allie Pleiter presents Branding for Sissies. Allie’s also giving away a copy of her new release, FALLING FOR THE FIREMAN. http://www.alliepleiter.com

Fri, 3/9 – Is your rough draft completed and ready to edit? Tracy Sumner gives us tips on the best way to edit a manuscript. http://www.tracysumner.com

All Romance University lectures are generously provided by our Visiting Professors. RU is a tuition-free zone!

All our best,

Jennifer Tanner, Becke Martin-Davis, Kelsey Browning, Adrienne Giordano, Robin Covington, Carrie Spencer, and Tracey Devlyn.

It’s an exciting time to be an author. The brass ring thought to be unreachable, in the last few years, is within our grasp. Authors have options these days they never thought possible. Self-publishing a.k.a. Indy publishing, small presses, digital presses, traditional publishing, even Amazon has gotten into the publishing business. So many options.

But here’s one option you don’t have, at least if you want to build a career and be taken seriously. Are you taking notes? Every author out there needs a good editor.

No matter who you are; no matter how many books you’ve published.

Here’s what happens when you don’t, and, sadly, this is a story about a New York Times, multi-published, bestselling author.

I’m often called to substitute at my mother’s bridge game. Her friends are aware that I’m a writer, and newly published. They’re proud of me and act as though I have insider knowledge to the publishing world. Ha! As such, one of my mother’s friends, a woman named Pat, approached me, book in hand.

I recognized the publisher instantly. It was one that accepts only agented submissions, and authors covet selling to such a powerhouse. I also recognized the author’s name upon first glance. I’ve read her work; I’m a fan. But in this case, Pat was upset and after she showed me why, I have to admit, I saw her point.

She’d taken this book by this acclaimed publisher and author, read it, then finally became so frustrated, she went back and circled the numerous typos on the pages. She even pointed out that the hero’s name was XX, when in the later pages it switches to YY. Pat had paid good money for this book, and now she was asking me what she should do about it.

Now, Solomon, I’m not. But when a woman in her eighties asks such a question, you don’t argue that mistakes happen in every published book, because in this case, there were simply too many to claim that defense. I suggested that Pat write the publisher, perhaps even ship the book back, mistake-ridden and all, and let them know of her displeasure.

I don’t know if she did, but it was worth a shot. Thinking about what must have happened I suspect the author was on deadline. Her editor and copy editor were probably swamped as well. And because the author has a tremendous fan base, and no doubt turned in quality products before, I suspect the publisher cut corners, e.g. rushed this project through without the attention the book or the author deserves. Will this publisher and author survive? Probably. Like the banking industry and AIG, they’re too big to fail. So far.

I think we must acknowledge that bad editing happens at any level in this industry. In my opinion, authors are way too close to the work and no matter how conscientious, or detail oriented, they often sail over their mistakes.

Recently, I asked three debut authors what they had learned from their editors. If you’re interested you can read about here: http://tinyurl.com/3mjeepa

And finally, I consulted three traditionally published authors to test my theory.

Joelle Charbonneau

Well, I’m delighted that I have a fabulous editor at Minotaur. She is great at paying attention to the tone my characters use. Sometimes when a person writes humor (which they say I do) it’s possible to skirt over the line from funny to offensive or from light-hearted to mean-spirited. My editor has more than once caught something that straddles that line. I distinctly remember a moment in SKATING OVER THE LINE that my editor flagged that made me first say “What’s wrong with that?” and then say “Oh…yeah, I need to change that.” The minute I did the scene became much funnier. It’s amazing how often that little change can alter the entire scene. An editor doesn’t have to suggest huge, sweeping changes to make all the difference in the world and a great editor is worth his or her weight in gold. (My editor is on the shorter side so she might be worth at least double her weight!)

Kylie Brant

One thing I really rely on my editors for is to help me keep my timeline and names straight. Because a full-time job prevents me from writing every day, and because I change things along the way, I sometimes have a story that skips from Tuesday to Saturday Or I decide to change a minor character’s name along the way and forget to change the others. More often I start spelling it differently toward the end. I appreciate the editors keeping these sorts of things straight for me!

Cindy Gerard

I’ve been in this business over twenty years and have 46 books published. During that time I’ve worked with approximately 13 editors. I cannot think of one instance where I didn’t learn something from their input or benefit from their expertise. Every editor who has touched my work has made it better. A very few were a bit intrusive but even then, their comments and suggestions made me stop and rethink some of my decisions because in the end, their goal was my goal: to make the book as good as it could possibly be. On the rare occasions when I didn’t agree with editorial input, their suggestions still gave me new perspective and made me a better writer.
So the long and the short of it is, while an editor can’t take a bad book and make it a good book, in my humble opinion, a good editor can take a good book and make it sing, dance and wag its tail.

Darn it. Cindy took the words right off of my keyboard. Still she supports my theory. In my opinion, a good editor can take your work to a higher level. As for those overworked, deadline-filled, and inexperienced–as I talked about above, they just might hurt you more than they can help.

So how about you? Do you have faith in your ability to put out a quality product without an editor? Have a better system that works? Tell us what works for you.

And for those who comment, I’ll give away an ARC of The Past Came Hunting.

***

RU Crew – don’t forget to comment/question – Donnell’s giving away an ARC of her newest book!

Join us tomorrow for a special post from Karen Tabke

***

Excerpt: THE PAST CAME HUNTING

Shock made her numb.
It wasn’t possible. How had she missed the connection? She hadn’t thought of the man in years. The cop who’d arrested her, his name had been . . . Crandall.
Somehow Mel found the strength to look into his eyes. And when she did, she came face to face with what could only be a mutually shocked expression.
“You,” she whispered.
“You,” he replied.

Fifteen years ago a young Colorado Springs police officer arrested a teen runaway accused of aiding a convenience store robbery and attempted murder. She was innocent, but still served prison time briefly. Her testimony sent the real criminal to jail for much longer. Now she’s a young widow raising a son, and the man she put in prison is free and seeking revenge. She moves to a home in a new neighborhood—then learns that her next-door neighbor is the by-the-book officer who arrested her. Now he’s a Colorado Springs Police Lieutenant. Like it or not, he may be the only one who can protect her and her son from the past he helped create.

Bio: Donnell Ann Bell is the recipient of numerous awards for her fiction and a debut author for Bell Bridge Books. She co-owns Crimescenewriters, a Yahoo group for mystery/suspense writers, with retired veteran police officer, Wally Lind. A longtime volunteer for RWA’s Kiss of Death Chapter and the former Overall Coordinator for the Daphne du Maurier Award for Excellence in Mystery/Suspense, Donnell has been one of Romance University’s guests on the often-confusing topic of contests. She was raised in New Mexico’s Land of Enchantment and today calls Colorado home. www.donnellannbell.com

Some of you will be sending in requested material as a result of the recent conferences. Because you want your submission to be as clean as possible, here are some tips to help you with the final edits. Each item on this list is a common problem in raw work, and it’s something that can get your manuscript rejected. We’ll take these in order of scale, from big picture to small detail.

1. Match the Edges.

Look at the big problem that’s set up in the opening of your book. When is it resolved? If it’s in the last chapter or two, good. If not, your book might have structural problems which will require a fairly extensive rewrite. The general idea is that the opening and ending should match in terms of plot: the major conflict established in the opening should be resolved in the end. (There are exceptions to this rule, such as stories with lead-in conflicts or “false” openings, but those are rare in romance.)

2. Check the Major Characters.

Isolate the scenes in which each of your major characters appears. This is easy to do if you use the cut and paste function in your word processor. Take all the scenes with your hero, and lay them out end to end in a separate file. Then do the same for your heroine. Read these scenes in isolation to evaluate each character’s behavior. Is it consistent? Does it ever lapse into blandness? Is the character’s motivation clear throughout? Are there instances of melodrama?

3. Check the Minor Characters.

Make a list of your minor characters, and for each one, jot down the purpose each serves.  What happens to the plot if you remove that character? If there’s no penalty for removal, then remove the character. If there is a penalty, but it can be resolved by having a different secondary pick up the functions of the cut secondary, then rewrite those scenes accordingly.

4. Measure the Middle.

We already matched the ends of your story to check for one kind of large scale structural problem. Now let’s look at the middle. Make a list of the scenes in the middle of the book. (The middle is everything that happens after the conflict is defined but before the final crisis that leads to the ultimate resolution of the conflict.) Look at the major actions taken in each scene. Can you explain those actions using a “because” statement? If not, it’s time to think about why your characters are taking those actions. If so, check the scene carefully to be sure that this causation is clear on the page. The reader has to be able to understand those reasons.

5. Location, Location, Location.

As long as we’re looking at this list of scenes, make a note for each scene indicating where it’s set. Next, jot down all the ways the setting contributes to the action of the scene. For example, if they’re on a boat, does the rocking motion have an impact on the scene action? If they’re in a restaurant, does the noise level make conversation difficult? Does the scene have symolic relevance of some kind? If the environment isn’t relevant to the scene action, can you think of ways to leverage the setting? Can you think of a different setting that might be more interesting?

6. Scene Openings.

Look at the first five lines of each scene. In that first five lines, do you establish setting, point of view, and some sense of the scene’s purpose? Setting and point of view are essential to ground and orient the reader, but in some cases, we use the openings of scenes to do something a little more omniscient and less personal. Those are special scene openings that require special handling, but for most scenes, you will want to lock down the sense of orientation right away. The scene purpose can be small or large, external or internal, subtle or direct, but it ought to be there in some form. If you get these things out of the way early, then there’s less likelihood for confusion as the scene unfolds.

7. Scene Endings.

Some scenes will end with a sense of things being all buttoned up and neat and tidy. Most scenes will end with a sense of forward movement, though. Even if the scene question is answered, even if the scene problem is solved, the end of the scene should make the reader wonder what’s next. The character might think, “Well, that’s done now,” when thinking about the problem on which the scene focused. But you don’t want the reader to think, “Well, the story’s done now,” and close the book. You don’t have to end on a cliffhanger or make the scenes feel unresolved, but you do have to keep the story moving forward, and sometimes even a subtle reminder of other problems at the end of a tidy scene will keep the reader interested.

8. He Said, She Said.

Scan your pages for quotation marks. Every time a character speaks, do three things. First, check the puntuation and mechanics. Commas, periods, open and close quotes – make sure this is all shipshape. Then make sure the paragraph changes every time the speaker changes, and make sure there aren’t random paragraph changes in the middle of one character’s dialogue. Second, check the tags. Can any of them be converted to beats? Beats (small bits of action attached to dialogue) are stronger than tags (he said, she asked, he exclaimed, and so on). Third, check for whether the identity of the speaker is obvious. If there are three or more characters in a scene, use a tag or beat with every line of dialogue to avoid reader confusion. If there are only two characters in the scene, you don’t have to tag or beat every line of dialogue. You can skip as many as three in a row before reader comprehension might become an issue. And even then, you might be able to skip more, but it’s risky and should be handled carefully.

9. Search and Destroy Mission.

Now we’re getting into the nitty-gritty of sentence mechanics. I recommend using the “find and replace” function in your word processor to change the font color of any overused words or weak words (just, that, so, very, and similar words). Also use the font color change to highlight weak verbs and verbs of being or appearance (was, seemed, looked, and similar). Use it to highlight thought tag words (wondered, thought, pondered, and similar). Finally, use it to change the font color of the letter combination “ing.” This will highlight present participial phrases, though it will also highlight unobjectionable words like finger and sing. You can ignore these safe words, but for everything else you’ve highlighted, revise to eliminate the color changes. Be ruthless. These things weaken your story, and you don’t want to submit a weak story, do you?

10. The Safety Net.

Proofreading is not something to be done quickly or to be taken lightly. I recommend a multi-step process for proofreading, because each step can catch different kinds of errors. First, run the spell-checker. This will clean out all the easy mistakes. Second, read the pages out loud. This will force you to slow down enough so that your eyes won’t skip over any missing words. It will also help you spot clunky rhythms and awkward phrasings. Third, do a separate proofreading pass for punctuation. It can be easy to overlook little details like commas in a regular proofreading pass, so a dedicated punctuation pass will help you catch more mistakes. If you’re worried that you might get sucked into the story again and overlook details during proofreading, then read the paragraphs in reverse order. You can either do all the passes on each paragraph before moving backward to the next, or you can do the entire chapter or manuscript in separate full passes.

These ten steps are time-consuming, to be sure, but then, so is the process of writing a novel. Don’t skimp on the last stages just because you can see the finish line. It’s far better to take a few extra days to make sure everything is clean and tight. Just take it step by step, and before you know it, your manuscript will be ready to dazzle the first reader.

***

Do you have any special revision and editing techniques? Share them in the comments!

Thinking of writing erotic romance? Stop by Jennifer Probst’s post Monday to see if you have the right stuff.

***

Theresa Stevens is the Publisher of STAR Guides Publishing, a nonfiction publishing company with the mission to help writers write better books. After earning degrees in creative writing and law, she worked as a literary attorney agent for a boutique firm in Indianapolis where she represented a range of fiction and nonfiction authors.

After a nine-year hiatus from the publishing industry to practice law, Theresa worked as chief executive editor for a highly acclaimed small romance press, and her articles on writing and editing have appeared in numerous publications for writers. Visit her blog at http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/ where she and her co-blogger share their knowledge and hardly ever argue about punctuation.

I finally got a rejection that wasn’t a form letter, but it says the editor didn’t connect with my characters.  How am I supposed to revise my manuscript with this comment in mind? 

How do I make an editor like my characters more?  My crit partners think my characters are good.

Stephanie

Hi, Stephanie,

This is a great question for two reasons. First, we get to talk about likability. This is a key factor for creating good characters in many genres. There are other factors, too, such as shock value and power plays, that can let you get around likability, but they’re much harder to pull off. Master likability first, and then tackle other methods for creating character-reader bonds.

What makes a character likable? The same things that make real people admirable. I find that this concept makes more sense if we phrase it in terms of admirability rather than likability. Make sure your characters are warm-hearted, fair, selfless, courageous, goal-oriented, solution-oriented, and so on. Make them avoid negative traits like whining, fatalism, dependence, helplessness, and inactivity. It’s not enough to put a hero in a blue shirt because women “like” men in blue. But if the collar is scratchy, and the hero wears it anyway because his niece picked it out for him, now we have the beginnings of a character that readers can admire and bond with.

This doesn’t mean you must turn your heroes into boy scouts. Even the most fierce, leather-clad, lone-wolf killing machine of a hero can be made likable if he is imbued with a strong sense of fair play and justice. Even the shy librarian orphan heroine can be likable if she comes out of her shell long enough to stop the neighborhood bullies from kicking the stray dog. It’s not just about type and traits, but about behavior.  

Second, this is a great question because it’s a very common problem.  Sad to say, but I routinely reject manuscripts because the characters are not strong enough.  So what makes a character strong?  They must have solid, powerful personalities that don’t disappear into the background.  They must have a strong sense of self.  They must be vibrantly presented, actively engaged in their own lives, and clear and consistent enough that we can predict how they would behave in a variety of settings.

When evaluating characters, I sometimes try to imagine how they would behave in an amusement park. Would they rush straight to the line for the scariest ride, or would they stand in the walkways and laugh as other people scream?  Would they study the map and come up with a plan to see the most in their allotted time?  Would they memorize showtimes?  Would they take time to eat a meal in the restaurant, or would they suck down a burger while standing in line?

The reason an amusement park works for this kind of analysis is that amusement parks must cater to a wide variety of personality types in order to be successful.  They need to appeal to thrill-seekers and fraidy-cats, those who collect experiences and those who collect objects, the methodical and the spontaneous, and every other personality dichotomy you can imagine. It’s a marvelous environment for understanding personality types.

It sometimes happens that I like a manuscript but I’m hesitating about it, and as soon as I put the characters in the amusement park, I know why.  I can’t figure out how they would behave in that environment.  This means that the author has not presented the characters clearly enough and strongly enough to allow me to understand their personalities.  I may understand why, in chapter four, they decided to drive across country.  But take them out of the context of the book, and the characters fall apart.

Strong characters don’t do this.  Your critiquing partners might like your characters, and your characters might behave in a way that’s consistent with the plot needs of your story.  But try this test.  Find a new beta reader, someone who is not familiar with this book.  Ask them to read it, and then ask them how your characters would behave in an amusement park.  Their answers might surprise you, particularly if they can’t answer at all.

Writing strong characters is a tricky business, and there are many, many resources available to help you with that, including Romance University with their fantastic ongoing series on the male mind.  Also, browse your bookstore shelves in the writing and psychology and a self-help sections, and you’ll find books on everything from archetypes to personality tests to — well, really, the list is a long one.  Writers never stop studying character because character is the basis for good fiction and because, as we age and mature, our understanding of the human condition evolves. Embrace this as part of the writing process, and your characters — and your readers — will love your books for it.

Theresa

To our RU readers, what do you think makes a character likable?  We’d love to hear from you.

If you have a question for Theresa you can submit it to askaneditor@romanceuniversity.org.  Don’t miss this great opportunity to have your concerns addressed by a top-notch editor!

After earning degrees in creative writing and law, Theresa Stevens worked as a literary attorney agent for a boutique firm based in Indianapolis where she represented a range of fiction and nonfiction authors. The lure of the courtroom led to a nine-year hiatus from the publishing industry, but now Theresa is back as Managing Editor for Red Sage Publishing, a highly acclaimed small press. Her articles on writing and editing have appeared in numerous publications for writers. Visit her blog at http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/ where she and her co-blogger share their knowledge and hardly ever argue about punctuation.