Some of you will be sending in requested material as a result of the recent conferences. Because you want your submission to be as clean as possible, here are some tips to help you with the final edits. Each item on this list is a common problem in raw work, and it’s something that can get your manuscript rejected. We’ll take these in order of scale, from big picture to small detail.

1. Match the Edges.

Look at the big problem that’s set up in the opening of your book. When is it resolved? If it’s in the last chapter or two, good. If not, your book might have structural problems which will require a fairly extensive rewrite. The general idea is that the opening and ending should match in terms of plot: the major conflict established in the opening should be resolved in the end. (There are exceptions to this rule, such as stories with lead-in conflicts or “false” openings, but those are rare in romance.)

2. Check the Major Characters.

Isolate the scenes in which each of your major characters appears. This is easy to do if you use the cut and paste function in your word processor. Take all the scenes with your hero, and lay them out end to end in a separate file. Then do the same for your heroine. Read these scenes in isolation to evaluate each character’s behavior. Is it consistent? Does it ever lapse into blandness? Is the character’s motivation clear throughout? Are there instances of melodrama?

3. Check the Minor Characters.

Make a list of your minor characters, and for each one, jot down the purpose each serves.  What happens to the plot if you remove that character? If there’s no penalty for removal, then remove the character. If there is a penalty, but it can be resolved by having a different secondary pick up the functions of the cut secondary, then rewrite those scenes accordingly.

4. Measure the Middle.

We already matched the ends of your story to check for one kind of large scale structural problem. Now let’s look at the middle. Make a list of the scenes in the middle of the book. (The middle is everything that happens after the conflict is defined but before the final crisis that leads to the ultimate resolution of the conflict.) Look at the major actions taken in each scene. Can you explain those actions using a “because” statement? If not, it’s time to think about why your characters are taking those actions. If so, check the scene carefully to be sure that this causation is clear on the page. The reader has to be able to understand those reasons.

5. Location, Location, Location.

As long as we’re looking at this list of scenes, make a note for each scene indicating where it’s set. Next, jot down all the ways the setting contributes to the action of the scene. For example, if they’re on a boat, does the rocking motion have an impact on the scene action? If they’re in a restaurant, does the noise level make conversation difficult? Does the scene have symolic relevance of some kind? If the environment isn’t relevant to the scene action, can you think of ways to leverage the setting? Can you think of a different setting that might be more interesting?

6. Scene Openings.

Look at the first five lines of each scene. In that first five lines, do you establish setting, point of view, and some sense of the scene’s purpose? Setting and point of view are essential to ground and orient the reader, but in some cases, we use the openings of scenes to do something a little more omniscient and less personal. Those are special scene openings that require special handling, but for most scenes, you will want to lock down the sense of orientation right away. The scene purpose can be small or large, external or internal, subtle or direct, but it ought to be there in some form. If you get these things out of the way early, then there’s less likelihood for confusion as the scene unfolds.

7. Scene Endings.

Some scenes will end with a sense of things being all buttoned up and neat and tidy. Most scenes will end with a sense of forward movement, though. Even if the scene question is answered, even if the scene problem is solved, the end of the scene should make the reader wonder what’s next. The character might think, “Well, that’s done now,” when thinking about the problem on which the scene focused. But you don’t want the reader to think, “Well, the story’s done now,” and close the book. You don’t have to end on a cliffhanger or make the scenes feel unresolved, but you do have to keep the story moving forward, and sometimes even a subtle reminder of other problems at the end of a tidy scene will keep the reader interested.

8. He Said, She Said.

Scan your pages for quotation marks. Every time a character speaks, do three things. First, check the puntuation and mechanics. Commas, periods, open and close quotes – make sure this is all shipshape. Then make sure the paragraph changes every time the speaker changes, and make sure there aren’t random paragraph changes in the middle of one character’s dialogue. Second, check the tags. Can any of them be converted to beats? Beats (small bits of action attached to dialogue) are stronger than tags (he said, she asked, he exclaimed, and so on). Third, check for whether the identity of the speaker is obvious. If there are three or more characters in a scene, use a tag or beat with every line of dialogue to avoid reader confusion. If there are only two characters in the scene, you don’t have to tag or beat every line of dialogue. You can skip as many as three in a row before reader comprehension might become an issue. And even then, you might be able to skip more, but it’s risky and should be handled carefully.

9. Search and Destroy Mission.

Now we’re getting into the nitty-gritty of sentence mechanics. I recommend using the “find and replace” function in your word processor to change the font color of any overused words or weak words (just, that, so, very, and similar words). Also use the font color change to highlight weak verbs and verbs of being or appearance (was, seemed, looked, and similar). Use it to highlight thought tag words (wondered, thought, pondered, and similar). Finally, use it to change the font color of the letter combination “ing.” This will highlight present participial phrases, though it will also highlight unobjectionable words like finger and sing. You can ignore these safe words, but for everything else you’ve highlighted, revise to eliminate the color changes. Be ruthless. These things weaken your story, and you don’t want to submit a weak story, do you?

10. The Safety Net.

Proofreading is not something to be done quickly or to be taken lightly. I recommend a multi-step process for proofreading, because each step can catch different kinds of errors. First, run the spell-checker. This will clean out all the easy mistakes. Second, read the pages out loud. This will force you to slow down enough so that your eyes won’t skip over any missing words. It will also help you spot clunky rhythms and awkward phrasings. Third, do a separate proofreading pass for punctuation. It can be easy to overlook little details like commas in a regular proofreading pass, so a dedicated punctuation pass will help you catch more mistakes. If you’re worried that you might get sucked into the story again and overlook details during proofreading, then read the paragraphs in reverse order. You can either do all the passes on each paragraph before moving backward to the next, or you can do the entire chapter or manuscript in separate full passes.

These ten steps are time-consuming, to be sure, but then, so is the process of writing a novel. Don’t skimp on the last stages just because you can see the finish line. It’s far better to take a few extra days to make sure everything is clean and tight. Just take it step by step, and before you know it, your manuscript will be ready to dazzle the first reader.

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Do you have any special revision and editing techniques? Share them in the comments!

Thinking of writing erotic romance? Stop by Jennifer Probst’s post Monday to see if you have the right stuff.

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Theresa Stevens is the Publisher of STAR Guides Publishing, a nonfiction publishing company with the mission to help writers write better books. After earning degrees in creative writing and law, she worked as a literary attorney agent for a boutique firm in Indianapolis where she represented a range of fiction and nonfiction authors.

After a nine-year hiatus from the publishing industry to practice law, Theresa worked as chief executive editor for a highly acclaimed small romance press, and her articles on writing and editing have appeared in numerous publications for writers. Visit her blog at http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/ where she and her co-blogger share their knowledge and hardly ever argue about punctuation.

Mon, 6/20 - Best-selling author Kate Douglas on ending a series. It doesn’t kill the characters, but it can be hell on authors. http://www.katedouglas.com/

Wed, 6/22 - Lindsey Faber, Managing Editor of Samhain Publishing, blogs about the differences between traditional and e-publishing from a publisher’s standpoint. http://www.samhainpublishing.com/

Fri, 6/24 - Star Publishing editor Theresa Stevens responds to a question from the mailbag about submissions procedures and what it all means. http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/

All Romance University lectures are generously provided by our Visiting Professors. RU is a tuition-free zone!

Best regards,
Jennifer Tanner, Becke Martin Davis, Adrienne Giordano, Robin Covington, Tracey Devlyn, Kelsey Browning and Carrie Spencer

This month, we’re taking a question from the mailbag. This one was sent in by Pauline Allen.

Regarding POV, do publishers prefer two person POV or is singular deep POV acceptable?

Pauline, although most romance publishers want scenes in the hero’s viewpoint, the proportions of hero POV to heroine POV vary somewhat depending on your target market. So let’s use this question as an opportunity to take a closer look at submission guidelines.

When a publisher is concerned about the number of scenes from the hero’s viewpoint, the guidelines will reflect that. For example, let’s take a look at the guidelines for the Silhouette Desire line, found at:

http://www.eharlequin.com/articlepage.html?articleId=553&chapter=0

Buried in the paragraph about the ideal Desire hero, we see a clue about POV proportions. “The Desire hero often has fewer scenes from his point of view, but in many ways, he owns the story.” How do we interpret this? Let’s break it down.

1. The hero has scenes from his POV.
2. But the heroine has more POV scenes.
3. This means we need more than 50% from the heroine’s POV, and fewer than 50% from the hero’s POV.
4. This is important enough to rate mention in the guidelines.
5. Scenes from the hero’s POV should be strong and purposeful. (He “owns the story.”) Don’t just switch because it might be time to switch.

So now you know, if you’re targeting Silhouette Desire, one possible interpretation of those guidelines. For contrast, let’s take a look at the submissions guidelines at Avon, found at:

http://www.avonromance.com/2010/03/19/avon-romance-submission-guideline/

You can search this page a long time and never find any tips about point of view. Does this mean they don’t care about the hero’s POV and you can safely skip it? Not necessarily. It just means they don’t feel so strongly about it that they’ll make it a formal guideline. But keep in mind that there are real people with preferences and opinions going through the submissions inbox. They’re highly trained and sensitive to market preferences. They know what they want, and they know what works for their readers, even if it’s not carved into the guidelines.

So how do you determine what their preferences might be? Check the line. If you’re targeting their historical line, scan some of the titles and look at the range of POVs. For example, Stephanie Laurens, a bestselling Avon author, sometimes has more than half the scenes in the hero’s POV. So we know that Avon historicals will at least consider a hero-heavy book. Will they consider a book with a single POV? Look through their current titles and recent backlist, and you’ll get some idea of that.

I think that your study of guidelines and current titles will show you that most romance publishers release books with scenes in both hero and heroine POVs, and few release books in single POVs. Why is that? Because it takes two (or more) to make a match. These stories aren’t about the adventures of one person, but about the formation of a bond between two people (or more – I keep adding that “or more” because of the popularity of polyamorous erotic romances). Readers don’t want to worry that a character is alone in the relationship. They want to see the bond develop from all sides.

But if the story has more to do with one character’s personal mission – some women’s romance or chick lit would fit this pattern – then a single POV is more appropriate. In that case, though, the story is probably not a romance even if it has romantic themes or threads.

All of which is to say: know your book. Know what you’re writing, your target market, your potential audience, and your potential publishers. And then you’ll know if you need to slant your story in any particular way, whether with POV choices or with changes to some other element.

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RU Crew, have you ever scratched your head over submission guidelines? Feel free to pick Theresa’s brain today!

Be sure to stop by Monday when the one-of-a-kind Anne Stuart will join us!

Theresa’s Bio:

Theresa Stevens is the Publisher of STAR Guides Publishing, a nonfiction publishing company with the mission to help writers write better books. After earning degrees in creative writing and law, she worked as a literary attorney agent for a boutique firm in Indianapolis where she represented a range of fiction and nonfiction authors. After a nine-year hiatus from the publishing industry to practice law, Theresa worked as chief executive editor for a highly acclaimed small romance press, and her articles on writing and editing have appeared in numerous publications for writers. Visit her blog at http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/ where she and her co-blogger share their knowledge and hardly ever argue about punctuation.

Okay, so you’ve written the next New York Time’s Best Seller! Great…right? How in the devil do you break down a mammoth 102,000 word count of complicated characters and complex plot lines into a teeny-tiny, member of the Lollipop Guild sized 150 word blurb that is guaranteed to make your book so enticing that the reader uses her Victoria’s Secret emergency panty fund to purchase your book instead of that water bra thing? Thanks for your wisdom.

~Pauline Allan

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Great question! Truly, you don’t have to write this particular blurb. Most publishers have in-house marketing people to do that for you. Remember, your first sale — the first one you hope to make with your submission — is to the editor, not to the bra-buying public. So your 150 words should be geared toward the needs of that first editorial reader.

How do you hook this editorial reader? You start by showing her that the book suits her editorial line, and then you show the one or two ways that your book will stand out from the pack. It’s the old “same but different” mindset. We need to see both the sameness (the suitability for the line and the breadth of the book’s appeal) and the differences (why your book is special). Save the complexity for the synopsis, but even there, please keep in mind that you don’t get to the bra-buyers unless you win over the overworked, eyestrained editor.

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I’ve been pitching my book to agents as science fiction, but after reading some of your posts I’m thinking that perhaps paranormal romance would be a better fit. Can you suggest a resource where I could find agents that are interested in that particular sub-genre? I’m familiar with QueryTracker and AgentQuery, but their searches don’t include sub-genres.

Thank you,

S. King

I’m not an agent, but in my experience, if an agent represents one kind of romance, she will probably represent the other kinds, too. This isn’t iron-clad, but more like a general tendency. If an agent intends to build relationships at romance houses, there’s little sense in doing that and then excluding entire groups of stories from consideration.

But there will always be personal tastes involved, such as an agent who gets squeamish over blood (vampires!) or one who loves historicals to the exclusion of all other romance types. The best way to suss out these kinds of personal preferences is to follow the authors an agent represents. Does she rep 40 romance authors, and not a single bloodsucker among them? That might be a clue. Do all of her authors write dialogue-heavy, super-pacey stories? That might be another clue.

By the way, you can mention this sort of thing in your query. “I noticed you represent Annie Author and Brenda Bestseller. Although my story is a different subgenre, its fast pace and tight focus are similar to books written by them.”

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What are the prospects for someone who’s not an established writer and is trying to sell a futuristic romance?  And if you have the time, please tell us what you think separates a futuristic romance from a science fiction story that has a significant amount of romance in it.  Or is there a difference?

Sincerely,

Mary Anne Landers

I’ve been keeping a close eye on this corner of the market for the past year or two. There is a core group of loyal science fiction romance readers, and there is the potential that these books will break through to a broader romance readership. (Also, just as a personal thing, I really enjoy these books, especially the world-building and the philosophical questions.) Will it happen? Eh. Maybe. Time will tell. I hope it will, though, because scifi romance submissions have been looking fresh and interesting lately. They deserve a broader readership.

How hard is it for a new writer to break in? This might sound like a non-answer, but the difficulty will be relative to how good the book is and how many slots are available. At my house, for example, we publish a few erotic scifi romance stories every year. For every one we publish, we probably get 30 or 40 submitted. (There are relatively few writers submitting these, which increases your odds.) You have no way of controlling the competition, but you can control the quality of your submission. Make the story as dynamic and engaging and thought-provoking as you can, and then make each sentence as well-written as you can.

When is it scifi romance, and when is it scifi with romantic elements? This question is probably harder to answer for scifi/romance than for other hybrids, if only because scifi frequently examines social organization, and the formation of romantic units and families is one way we organize societies. That said, if the core story is about the formation of a romantic attachment, then it’s romance. If the story ends when the lovers unite in some form of HEA-bond, then it’s romance. But if that bond is never achieved, or if it’s achievement is but one step in the middle of the plot, then you’re probably dealing with scifi with romantic elements.

On the topic of science fiction romance, I have a question for RU’s readers. The conventional wisdom is that science fiction is mainly appealing to teens and young adults who are awakening to the kinds of big questions raised in these stories. After about the age of 25, readership (it is claimed) drops off to a core, loyal audience, and the youthful scifi reader moves on to other story types. Has this been your experience? Did you read more science fiction in high school or college than you do at present? Why do you think that’s so?

Answer the question in the comments, and you’ll be entered to win a download of Partners by Cricket Starr, an erotic science fiction novella from Red Sage Presents. I happen to think this story is a great representative of the genre. Read it and see if you agree with me!

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A huge thanks to Theresa, Pauline, S. King and Mary Anne!!

Join us on Monday for our Romantic Suspense sub-genre segment with multi-published author Roxanne St. Claire and literary agent Jill Marsal. Find out what’s hot and what’s not!

Theresa’s Bio:

After earning degrees in creative writing and law, Theresa Stevens worked as a literary attorney agent for a boutique firm based in Indianapolis where she represented a range of fiction and nonfiction authors. The lure of the courtroom led to a nine-year hiatus from the publishing industry, but now Theresa is back as Managing Editor for Red Sage Publishing, a highly acclaimed small press. Her articles on writing and editing have appeared in numerous publications for writers. Visit her blog at http://edittorrent.blogspot.com/ where she and her co-blogger share their knowledge and hardly ever argue about punctuation.

The floor is yours, Ann Leslie!

From the moment you hit the “send” key, you’re on pins and needles wondering if the editor you targeted will like your project enough to make an offer.  You’ll undoubtedly be assuaged with countless doubts as you wait for what feels like forever.

I’m hoping, however, that I can address some of the submission errors I’ve seen in the twelve years I’ve been at Harlequin so that you’ll not only feel more in control of the submission process but your project will also have a better chance of being bought.  In addition to looking for original projects that are well written, have unique and compelling voice and are free of clichés, I’d rank the top 3 submission errors as follows:

1. Presentation. It may seem like I’m stating the obvious here but be sure to do your homework to make sure you are selling your project to the right person and the right house.   Be sure to check submission guidelines, which are pretty much online now, and make sure the information you’re working with is current, e.g. the editor hasn’t left the house, changed her name or been promoted, and the line or imprint has not folded or changed direction.  You might also go to the bookstore or online to acquaint yourself with some of the house/imprint’s most recent releases. The information in the cover letter is key as this is your only chance to sell your project.  Generally, it should briefly convey a brief overview of the plot, some marketing hooks or market comparisons and your background and credentials as a writer. Before you send off the letter and your project, don’t forget to give both a careful proofreading.  I can’t tell you how many submissions I’ve seen with typos and grammatical errors.  Generally, if the submission is great, I want to overlook those errors.  But it does raise some doubts in my mind about the writer.

2. Pacing.  To engage readers, show don’t tell your story.  I’ve seen too many opening chapters bog down with narrative detail and not enough meaningful dialogue.  This often makes the chapters read like a rehashing of the synopsis as the author dutifully fills the reader in on the back story, descriptions and setting and I find myself skimming those pages to get to the meat of the story.  I’ve also seen the writer try to set up the story with an opening scene involving one of the protagonists and a secondary character or two.  Again, this slows down the pacing and feels like the writer is providing filler.  The most compelling openings I’ve found involve the hero and heroine interacting in a compelling, unique situation with dialogue that advances the plotting.  Not only does dialogue tighten the pacing but it also enables the reader to become more involved and start identifying with the wonderful characters you are creating.

3. Emotional Conflicts. Because romance readers know how the story will end, it’s important to give your main characters meaningful and developed emotional conflicts.  These generally boil down to an issue of trust, especially if the character has suffered a significant loss in his/her life.  A well-developed conflict will require the hero or heroine to grow during the course of your romance so that he or she is a different person by the end of the story.   A strong conflict will also maintain a high level of romantic tension as readers wonder how each character will find the strength and courage to overcome a seemingly insurmountable emotional hurdle.  Your romance will, of course, have an external conflict but this conflict is generally resolved before the emotional conflict is.  And the events in the manuscript should all work to bring the emotional conflicts to the surface, to a boil and then to a satisfying resolution that will seem neither clichéd nor contrived.

As scary as it can be to hit the “send” button, you should know that editors are always looking for talented new writers.  We are always eager to receive a well written, original submission by a writer with a unique voice.  I wish you the best of luck with your submissions and look forward to addressing any questions you might have today.

Thank you, Ann Leslie!

RU Readers, do you have any burning questions about submissions Ann Leslie can help you with?

Ann Leslie Tuttle is a Senior Editor at Harlequin Books. Although she actively acquires for HQN Books, MIRA and Harlequin/Silhouette Books, she is especially interested in finding paranormal romance and commercial literary fiction. Ann Leslie joined Harlequin Books in 1997, having worked for Charles Scribner’s Sons and the University Press of Virginia. She earned her B.A. from the College of William and Mary and her M.A. at the University of Virginia. She has taught a course in Romance writing at Marymount Manhattan College.

Please stop back on Monday when Dorchester Editor Leah Hultenschmidt offers unpublished authors career advice on building name recognition.